****This is the end of Chapter 4!****
When they were finished with their leave paperwork, Kate and Spencer had to finish their shifts but made plans to pack the car after dinner and leave early in the morning. “I’ll Google the route later, and print out directions. What time do you want me to stop by tonight?” Spencer asked before going his way.
“Eight o’clock ok?”
“Works for me.”
As Kate drove back to the security forces building she contemplated what had happened in her life during the last few months. What had happened to her nice, quiet independent come-and-go life? How on earth was she going to adopt the life of motherhood with no preparation or parenting classes under her belt? And single motherhood at that. All her life she took classes to prepare for things-school and college for life skills, air force classes and training for her job, driver’s education for her license. She hadn’t signed up for this, and had no training whatsoever. She was blessed though to have so many friends willing to help her and she would definitely count on it.
Kate was relieved to get some time off even though it was for picking up a daughter she didn’t know existed a month ago. She had a few days to absorb this adventure, and an adventure she was sure it would be. In her purse there was a long list of things to buy before the drive back home. Spencer had shared before that he had a few nieces and nephews and wasn’t afraid of children. She had huffed back, she wasn’t afraid, either. Just hadn’t planned on being around them much, and certainly not raising any. Not someone else’s child and by herself, especially.
She couldn’t believe that Sarah was the reason John hadn’t told her he loved her. Had she been that adamant about not being a mother because her own had abandoned her? She thought about that for a few minutes and realized she had. In the presence of her coworkers, she swore several times she would never be a mother. What would they think now?
On the other hand, how could she abandon Sarah? It wasn’t her fault both her parents died and left her behind. How tragic. Kate would have to remember that, while raising her. Being left behind by one parent on purpose was one thing, but by death of both parents was a whole other issue.
After work, Kate stopped for some tacos since she wouldn’t be cooking. In the refrigerator was a yogurt and banana for her breakfast, otherwise it was all cleaned out except for the cheese and milk Spencer had bought the other day. All she had to do was fold her clothes and pack the diaper bag with what she thought were essentials. The big stuff like high chair and crib, she would have Spencer help her with after their return.
She left the diaper bag and her bag of parenting magazines purchased the other day by the door and then folded her clothes into her suitcase. In the bathroom, she packed her makeup and extra toothbrush. Buttons moped around, watching her pack. But what he didn’t know was that Jen was going to stay here and watch him for her. Jen lived with two roommates, so she was looking forward to staying alone for a week.
Looking around her place, Kate thought about how different things were going to be with a little one around. She had a lot of work to do when they got back. Outlets to plug, rugs to move, plants to put up, cords to wrap, the list was endless. There were probably more she wasn’t even aware of.
Kate took Buttons for his evening walk and breathed in the crisp night air. The days were getting shorter as fall slowly took over the former long summer days. Leaves blew around their feet as they trekked around the walking trail. Kate was glad that Buttons could stay home this time; he always took some readjusting after one of her trips. The other good thing was that this trip was one of the shortest she’d taken in a long time.
After their walk, Kate gave Buttons a treat which he took to his bed to enjoy. While she did last minute tasks like watering her houseplants of which she had many, she thought at least she had Spencer going with her for support. She was grateful for his immediate offer to help and thought it was the least he could do, considering the whole situation. She realized that it must have been hard for him not to tell her. She wondered now if that was what he had started to say a couple times when they had been together while John was deployed. He seemed to have something on his mind a few times then wouldn’t say what it was when she asked.
Spencer was a really nice guy and if she hadn’t met John first, she might have been more interested in him. She wondered if anything could ever happen between them, now that John was gone, but it didn’t seem possible and anyway, John’s death was still too fresh to give it much thought. He did have several qualities she admired though. He was generous, thoughtful, funny, always willing to help and seemed compassionate toward her circumstances. Plus he was cute in his own way and tall and strong which she always wanted in a man. He was actually three inches taller than John.
And he wasn’t afraid of children like she was. Hmm. Maybe there was a reason to all this madness after all. But she would have to think more about it after a good night’s rest. After a quick prayer for safety on their trip, Kate went to bed with a mild headache and a major heartache.
Until next time,